Library Art - Matt Portraits

Kids are always coming up to me at work and asking me for scrap paper. They take the paper and the little golf pencils and draw all sorts of crazy psychedelic things and recently, to my surprise, me! Here is some of the notable kid rendered portraits:

This little gem was drawn for the "libaby man." I especially enjoy the photo-like details the artist included, such as how the stripes in my tie clash with those on my shirt, my egg shaped head, my "hair flap," and my fingerless hands. Okay, so I might be picking on this picture a little bit, but I love it. And as you're about to see, the pictures only get weirder from here.

I've forgotten the exact conversation that accompanied this, but it went something like this:

Little Kid - I drew this for you, you're a pig!

Me - uh that's nice.

Little Kid - aahh hahahahahaha giggle hahaha

The kid that drew this is an older kick who fascinated by the concept of beards. I've actually had to yell at him for trying to touch it. So he drew this. I don't know what he means by "P.S. Slick/Slave/Shave good," or by "might be Santa or Beep."

These with the purple background were drawn by a brother/sister combo. The sister drew/wrote the bottom one. She also verbally called me a girl. I responded by saying something like "so are you." She totally didn't have a response to that! Assumedly that is me in a dress. Apparently I pull it off.

The inaccuracies in this one disgust me. I am appalled by this misleading portrayal. My laces are never, I repeat, never tied that neatly.

Thrifting Treasures - Author Signed Book

My name is Matt and I have a problem. If you helped me move a couple of weeks ago, you might have notices approximately 6-7 heavy boxes with the word "BOOKS" written on the top. And if you think that is a lot of books, please take into account that before packing I made a point to donated almost half of my collection. Books in my possession fall into three general categories: Books for Reading, Books for Crafting, and Books for Display. The Stolen Spoon Mystery by Irene Bowen, which I found in a local thrift store, falls neatly into the "Display" category.

The characteristic that attracts me to most of my Display/Crafting books is the cover. In this instances, I liked not only the cover, but also the color, and the slightly peculiar title. Upon further inspection of this book, I happened upon an interesting inscription and clip out.

So I looked at the inscription, then at the clipping, and then back to the inscription, then at the clipping, and then back to the inscription, then at the clipping, and then back to the inscription, then at the clipping, and then I realized, this "Irene Bowen" was mentioned in both, and was likely the same person! So I bought the book for $2. Then I wrote a sub par blog about it.

The End.

Library Projects - Tree Fan

Summer vaction - a time of rest and relaxation right? Well, not so much for children's librarians. The kids have gotta go somewhere during Summer Vacay, and from where I'm sitting, they go to the library.

Anyways, in order to handle this influx of children, my coworkers and I divide the kids up by grades, and then plan programs specifically for the different age groups. I got the 2nd and 3rd graders this summer. This is the perfect age group because they find everything that I do funny, which also makes this the most intelligent and tasteful age group.

Our programs basically consist of crafts and games, and the tree fan was the first project I did with them this summer. It all began when I cleaned out a filing cabinet, and found hundreds upon hundreds of unused green folders. These folders had been sitting there since the Reagan era, and I figured that odds were they would not be missed. A bit of cutting with the crinkly sissors (my name for them), and voila, I have my tree tops.

I then though it might be a nice touch if there were little apples and leaves to go onto the tree tops. By "nice touch" I really mean "a time waster" because I was already beginning to fear that the kiddies would finish this project way too fast.

Now I needed the tree trunks/fan handle. Luckily, I've managed to set a standard of doing curious things involving trees while visiting upstate, so my parents hardly batted an eye at me wandering around our yard and woods collecting sticks. I give all of the collected and cut supplies to the kids, throw in some tape and glue sticks, and alakazam, tree fans:

So that was the finished product! I considered this project a success for a couple of reasons:

1. To my knowledge, none of the kids stabbed each other with the sticks.

2. To my knowledge, I was not stabbed with any of the sticks.

3. At one point, I had 10 or so kids fanning me with their completed fans. This gave me the perfect opportunity to use my Maniacal Laugh of Supreme Accomplishment.

That basically was it for the craft part of the first program. The rest of the time was spent with them throwing pool noodles at one another, and then ended with them doing their best impression of an angry mob, chanting "cheater" at me (I showed them a number guess trick and refused to tell them how I did it.) All in all another successful program!